The Second Noble Truth

I read this quote later in the day, after I wrote this post...kind of sums it up for me :)
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I am in competition with no one. I run my own race. I have no desire to play the game of being better than anyone, in any way, shape or form. I just aim to improve, to be better that I was before. That’s me and I am free. — Unknown

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Are we poor, if we have nothing, but we have happiness? Wealth does not guarantee happiness, and it is not permanent-but does it help us to be happy? Or, is it a tool to reach goals? Are goals counter-productive to happiness? Or, are goals healthy as a way to push towards the path of new wisdom? Or are they unhealthy, if goals focus on, or are influenced by external sources-like wealth or status? If setting goals makes us happy as a tangible path, are they counter-productive, if they require external ratings or value?  

Hmnnn….what does dogtraining sort of have to do with the Second Noble Truth in Buddhism? When we are aware and work towards wisdom, we learn. When we work towards learning, we can teach. Solutions to many things, including training our dogs, come from within, not from others. Buddha’s teachings were primarily rooted in ending human suffering. There are no "goals" in his teachings that would equate to training goals, but karma, mindset and quieting your mind are all part of training, for me. My intention behind my actions is to be happy, and happy training my dogs, while they are happy learning. None of us needs to suffer or feel less than happy, in the process. Really pretty simple. 

Goals!

Gotta have ‘em, or do we? I’ve been thinking about goals a lot lately. Some people are very goal-driven in life and work, or with many dog-people who are title or rankings driven. Some are easy to spot as the ones who list every point earned in email signature lines :) I think, that I am maybe not so very much goal-driven, in a quantifiable way, or at least in the way that I see that others are. But, I am trying it on for size, as long as it makes me happy! I do not want to need others to tell me when I’m “good”…yes praise is always nice to hear, but it is not my internal motor.

Only half the year left, but I am thinking about what I want to accomplish in business and with my dogs…of course would rather “it” was just to be able to focus, just on the dogs, but the business makes “it” possible to have the goals with the dogs…ha ha ha!!! I work for the reward of training and competing with my dogs! Win or Lose, we are happy....but I do not work towards needing to "beat" another, it is about doing our best out there, together.

As I’m training, the ultimate of what we are striving for (if I have even thought about what that is…that is what I’m working on formulating now) is never as important to me, as the process and fun of getting there with my dog-together sharing the experience and the path. But, if training in a particular venue is fun, is testing out our skills as trainers to see what we have in competition, also part of the process? For some people, this is a non-question, they would not even consider not competing, or trying to win or “beat” someone’s time, etc. Are they happy, if they don’t? I don't worry about it. I have read where some think that if you are not competitive, there is something wrong with you. I wonder why? Why do some people need to "prove" themselves, more than others?

 I don’t get nervous competing. Maybe that is not a good thing? Does the nervousness mean you are pushing yourself more, or feel you have more on the line, or need to impress someone? Or is it self-doubt? I do get nervous, if I know that I have not trained the skill well enough, or know that I have a greener dog who may be affected by what is going on around them. If I feel a bit of nervousness, I ask myself why...and it usually disappears.

I don’t think about what anyone outside the ring is thinking of us, when my dog and I are in the ring either…I wonder if that is also not a good thing? Would I be more goal-driven if I felt pressure from others and their goals? Because, I do not, I guess. So, I would say that not being nervous is healthy. But, I am happy just to be there, with my dog, as long as they are happy to be there too. My intent is to do our best, regardless of how others may see or measure what they see. They don't run in our or our dog's bodies, how can they "know" what they are really seeing from months of work, or an injury or a moment where you wish you'd handled something differently on course? We walk in our footprints, I make no assumptions of another's journey there...I often wonder how others can assume what they know of mine, or my dog's.

I had a friend tell me once that I was the least competitive person they knew, who also liked to compete. Maybe I have more of a “if it will be, it will be”-feel towards competition? I do my best to give my heart to the work and the perfection of the work…or I wouldn’t enjoy the hours and process of working with my dogs, but the work is never complete or exists other than because I strive to find the ultimate bliss in the connection with my dog. Nor, am I “let down” if “it”..as in training or competing doesn’t work…I just keep working. A simplistic version of you cannot know your are enlightened, until you are?

When we compete, is it the only goal for our hours of training-or, do we do both training and competing to enjoy the time we spend with our dogs? Or, for recognition? Or, for titles? Or for what? Can we just do our own thing, if we don’t have some sort of goal? Can we be happy if no one ever notices us?

I think I do push myself out of my comfort level to learn more or to do “better”. Intellectually people can gauge that-some are afraid, some avoid, some embrace, some are fueled by the challenge… but when we compete it is impossible to predict what will happen, which dog we will bring to the startline and also how they will feel at that moment. 

I do not generally push my dogs past their comfort level, I am much easier on them, than on myself. But, when it comes down to it…I am there with my dog, we are there together. We are competing together, not against anyone else. On a team like in flyball or a Tournament team in USDAAA, we are competing together as well, so hopefully everyone accomplishes their goal, team is not about "I", it is about "we"....

I rarely check run or time results of my own-let alone others, just check to see if I should consider taking the ribbon that may just a bit selfishly, self-reward our efforts. But, as much as having lots of stuff doesn’t make me happy, that one little emblem of many hours of work, can. Silly as it can be, a ribbon can make me happy, as I celebrate our accomplishment with my dog. If we happen to do better than someone who has been unkind to me, their dog or whatever..I can be just a little bad in being happy about that too…but then I let it go quickly, before I become like them.

I don’t know if being more competitive will make me more happy. I do see some people that it seems to make pretty unhappy. I do know that if I train my brilliant dogs, I do not need the validation-other than going out there to test our training out, but my dogs really do deserve to shine. So…my goal is to set some new competitive goals for some of my crew. 

Recently after setting a goal for one, was so disappointed when he didn’t have his chance… this was more of a clutch in my heart moment of achievement, and sadness of not sure we will have another chance, as there are few opportunities.  But, if that is in my heart, there must be more competitive goal-driven spirit hidden away-to feel such sadness, to have a goal stripped away....or maybe it is just knowing how much time I spent getting him "better". Maybe next year, or we change our goal? 

Maybe my competitive spirit just needs to be awakened. But, is that the path to awareness or a step back? Some people seem so ruled by "it", always sizing up who may be their competition. I expect I will still focus on just doing my best and continuing to not compare to others. Not being as competitive, others assume they can bowl you over at times...it doesn't mean that you don't have a strong backbone...just maybe a bit less need to prove yourself to others. :) If thinking of being more competitive with and against myself, inspires me to do more..so be it. But, if I find that having more goals for the dogs, makes me or them unhappy-we will readjust. Ultimately, no matter what goals we set, for me it is all about enjoying the path together, not the ribbon….even if it is kinda pretty :)